Back to Book

I'm finally back at the book. In truth I have several in the works but there is one that has been haunting me for many years and I am finally back into it after another recollection formatting scenario.

I've been working on this epic for more than twenty years. It is in effect a story spanning more than thirty years and fifty years in the making. Now I know that sounds confusing but it really isn't.

The book is about a spiritual journey, mine, and what I have found and learned. Because I need some kind of time reference it is loosely based in chronological order that coincides with my life but the content really has nothing to do with time. I only use the time as a reference for my progression of events.

I just thought I'd mention it here because I will likely not be putting much up here for a while, not that I know if anyone follows this anyway. Besides I had to tell someone.

later

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We are not Pets

People are not pets. Yet many treat their pets better than their loved ones.

The average pet owner makes sure the animal has its food and water, looks after their ailments and plays with them. And as long as the ground rules of not urinating on the furniture or ripping the couch apart with the claws are not broken, the animal is then left to do their thing. Their thing being - what it is they do. A dog gets to be a dog and a cat is allowed and encouraged to be - a cat. We do not try to change them or their behavior. These animals are 'allowed' to be all that they can or wish to be within the restraints of their environment and in so doing, they thrive and show their affection accordingly.

So what's my point? Far too many people do not have the luxury of such a life where we can be ourselves. Far too many men want to control their women as if property, demanding various duties and controls. Likewise far too many women try to change their man into something they do not wish to be, saying such thing as if you love me you'll this for me.

Our basic marriage vows even demand such garbage which immediately puts restraints on the natural human state. That of being all that one can be.

It's one thing to change into something you secretly wish to be by encouragement. Its entirely another thing to be forced into a model of something you are not or wish to be. And to need control over anyone is only showing a weakness in themselves. Unfortunately, knowing these things seldom helps the situation because mentioning you knowledge of such only fuels the fire of resentment and the war starts.

So where did we go wrong? Quite simply we go wrong by trying to change and control something (someone) who has just as much right of being themselves as anybody else. These persons under control and pressure to reinvent themseves do not thrive, their spirit dies inside and thus - envy their own pets who are treated better.

Our pets thrive when we let them be what they are. Its too bad many a man (as in human) does not seem to have the same basic rights, to be themselves and to express themselves in a way that suits them without restraint.

Of course if such a person is allowed to do the things which are not tolerated or admired, they may not be loved, but that would be their choice - not someone else's.

The expression is true; if you love something set it free. This doesn't mean kick them out or send them away. It simply means - let them be all they can be. Let your loved one be themselves and except that we are all different and unique individuals. You can not control what you do not own, and you do not own anybody. If a person is allowed to be free, they will thrive and give their love back to you. They would also be at peace with themselves and they would have no reason to leave.

Love is not control. It is not demanding or even sacrificing. Love asks nothing, demands nothing and it excepts all. Love can be a compromise, but it does not squash the spirit of anyone or anyone's idividuality.

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3

Check out Zeek.ca for more images, articles and various things I've been up to. www. zeek.ca

Head Games

I used to say - that seems funny - in times of wonder. Later it got to a point where I would wonder what caused it. Sometimes I would figure it out, putting it down to stress or a variety of other reasons. These answers however inciteful, would ultimately lead to more questions and the process would continue.

I suppose this has been how it has always been. Thinking back its been the same since childhood when questions were asked to understand a thing which would lead to another question and the parent would have a question machine on their hands. That's when the child is in the why, but why, how come continuous banter. Sound familiar? And although this could be frustrating on the parent particularly when they were busy with their own troubles, it was good for the child and it was also a good sign that they were learning. The worst thing a parent can do to that child would be to styfull (squash) this behavior, unfortunately we do this too often as the 'time was not right'.

Now I have noticed several stages in my time where I felt I knew everything I need to know - at least on a particular subject, then something 'unusual' would happen that would shake up my ill conceived perception of things and I would realize that I knew nothing at all. I had the same experience a couple of days ago and I turned fifty - a few years ago.

What happened was, I had broken a star driver (a type of socket wrench) while undoing a very stubborn bolt. I turned the broken piece over in my hand to read the name of the manufacturer the undeniable words printed in tiny grey letters read Craftsman. Great I thought, its a lifetime warranty, all I have to do is return it for a new one. I gave the broken bits to a friend who was going to the Sears dealer and offered to return it for me.

A few days later my friend returned with my new socket and then informed me that the clerk wasn't going to return it because she didn't think it was a Craftsman product because it had only the letters CR and a part number on it. "What I a said", because I knew I had read Craftsman on that tool. The clerk did exchange the tool but my curiosity got to me so I went to check the remaining set of sockets. Now I know I purchased these particular sockets as a set and had never had a problem with them before. Nor had I broken any. So I pulled out the remaining set and read the names of CR- and part number on each and every one of them. Not a Craftsman to found?

Its true the mind can play tricks on us all right, but this one got to me. I could see the possibility of imagining seeing the word Craftsman because I wanted to see it there, so I could get a return. I mean I have to admit that is possibility at least. But for that to happen, wouldn't I have to first consciously think of the word first in order to conceive it?

I would swear on a stack of Bibles that I read those words plain as day. And yet, I had no conscious thought of any name being there before I turned it over to read it. It could have been one of at least a dozen different company names found in my tool box. So why Craftsman? And how could it be so vivid when it was not even there? How can the mind perceive to see a thing that never was if the mind has not first conceived it to be? I mean, if the conscious mind did not dream it up, then from where did it come. You might what to state the sub-conscious but if that were so, the conscious would have to be aware of it before one was able to 'see' it, isn't that so? So from where then, did this image come? Do you know? It kind of boggles the thinking spot.

As strange and troubling as this might seem, I have to ask how often does this type of thing occur and to how many people throughout our lives? Thinking or seeing a thing that might not be there? Maybe this is why so many events experience by a group of people are perceived differently?

I have a theory for all of the above but its too complex to get into right now - wait for the book.

I just thought I'd mention it because this one event simply spoke to me - very loud - NOT all things are what they seem.

Food for thought.

American Idol

Damn she is gorgeous!

I don't know if you've been watching or what you think about it but, I can't help notice the conflict between Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell.

It looks as though she is regretting having slept with Simon. Now I'm not saying this is fact and if I'm wrong, I truly apologize however, if they haven't been intimate they are definitely acting as though they're having a lovers spat. Of course this adds to the 'entertainment' value of the TV series but the tensions that go with it do not go over very well.

Personally I feel for Paula. It must be very difficult for a person of her stature to be or even to act as an average person can. With her beauty and talent, she is likely 'used' by many to further their personal gains. I don't mean this sexually but I'm sure a person of her position would have a very difficult time in being able to trust anyone as to their motive. After awhile of dealing with this kind of lifestyle it has to be hard on a person. Maybe this is way she is still single - I think?

I have to give her a great deal of credit, because if my assumptions as above are correct, I think she has done a fantastic job of being true to herself without disrespecting or degrading her being in doing so - well done. Even if it is only dealing with Simon- well done.

Simon on the other hand comes across as a sad lonely man who needs attention and will do almost anything to get it. This is why he is so mean and cruel to the contestants. He gets noticed by it. In his mind he is doing nothing wrong. He is only being true to himself. It is just sad that a person has to go to these lengths to be noticed. And although I'm not a great fan of Simon's, I do think that most of the time his critique is accurate, although he could have approached many suggestions differently. Its as though he has no or very little social skills. At the same time he is trying to be true to himself as well.

I don't know why I felt compelled to write this. In many ways it stinks of gossip. Maybe I just thought it was important to understand or to at least look at the possible reasons people do the things we do. Often the ugliest things done which we are all capable of doing, are done with the greatest intent possible, but somewhere along the way, it gets messed up bad. And if anything can be messed up, give it to a human and see what happens to it.

Now I'm also a firm believer in the power of intent so how could this go wrong if the intent was of good? The only thing I can find for an answer to this is that, if the intent is not from the heart, that is, if the intent is not of a true nature, then it will become only what you do not want.

Just a thought - I'm full of them - or it